Saturday, November 05, 2005

God Part Three

Shrimp, crab, lobster, clams, mussels, all these are an abomination before the Lord, just as gays are an abomination. Why stop at protesting gay marriage? Bring all of God's law unto the heathens and the sodomites. We call upon all Christians to join the crusade against Long John Silver's and Red Lobster. Yea, even Popeye's shall be cleansed. The name of Bubba shall be anathema. We must stop the unbelievers from destroying the sanctity of our restaurants.

Leviticus 11:9-12 says:
9 These shall ye eat of all that are in the waters: whatsoever hath fins and scales in the waters, in the seas, and in the rivers, them shall ye eat.
10 And all that have not fins and scales in the seas, and in the rivers, of all that move in the waters, and of any living thing which is in the waters, they shall be an abomination unto you:
11 They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcases in abomination.
12 Whatsoever hath no fins nor scales in the waters, that shall be an abomination unto you.

Deuteronomy 14:9-10 says:
9 These ye shall eat of all that are in the waters: all that have fins and scales shall ye eat:
10 And whatsoever hath not fins and scales ye may not eat; it is unclean unto you.

God Hates Shrimp


At 8:11 PM, Anonymous Tutti Frutti said...

Would I rather pinch the tail and suck the head off of a shrimp or a fag, hard to make an educated choice here. Ya ya ya! Redneks forever!

At 8:30 PM, Anonymous Honus Fagner said...

Blasphemy, may a torrent of hogpiss rain down upon your head. The Lord shall not have HIS name taken in vein, not even a shrimps vein. Wang Dag Doodle, you got my dander up.
Which one are you in the picture?

At 8:39 PM, Blogger verdantone said...

I'm the one sitting behind that Metro box eating a big plate of scampi...

At 4:57 AM, Blogger MrC said...

i love the bible ... so full of contradictions & ridiculous rules ... i'm gonna be asking all the god-lovers at work if they eat shrimps!!

At 2:15 AM, Anonymous Gordon Coale said...

I don't mind if you copy this image from my blog but I would appreciate it if you don't link to the image on my blog and suck up my bandwidth. Thanks.

At 8:04 AM, Blogger verdantone said...

sorry...awfully impolite of me...problem solved...


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